Donut day

I picked up a dozen donuts to take to the Senior Painting meeting this morning. Donuts are a big treat. When i was working we often took them to work to share. It also reminded me that Saturdays were donut days at Jackie's house. It was a family tradition for her to make donuts Sat. a.m and the family would come over and hang out and eat them. It's been more than six months since she could muster up the energy to make them - but they were getting something from Paneras or a bakery to still have the get togethers, though brief. Whatever leftovers there were, went home with their grandson, who bought his first house this past year. They are so proud of him. Now he is engaged and there will be a wedding in the next year when his fiance gradutes from college. They have been a couple for several years and spend holidays together. Losing J will be hard for him too. The cabinet is one the grandson made for Jackie's kitchen. The last photo here is Jaxx with Sophia and the new great grandson. She says he is such a mellow baby, calm and relaxed about everything. That won't last. LOL

More of Jackie's art

As you can see Jaxx had many talents. Sewing, crochet, collage, all the mixed media things so many of us love. She likes to add beads and odd twigs and things which incorporate her love of color and nature.

Weather and such

Every day Jackie and I would compare weather. Usually it is breezier here. Often she gets more rain there. We are less than 75 miles apart distancewise and both in the valley, but these little differences affect our daily lives. We waited so long this year for summer to come, for the dreary rains (which we needed) to end so we could putter in our gardens. Well, puttering time is here. I can be outside, while Jackie is not able to get up at all now. But, I will think of her when I'm in my garden. As I always think of my parents, and Verna Mae. And Frank and Ray and Jodi.

Year before last, my granddaughter had a Halloween party in my garden and I painted some ghosts on discarded fence boards. This year we had to cover the little gaps in the fence where my dogs and the neighbor dog like to fight it out. My grandson Trevor nailed the (recycled once again) ghosts over the gaps in one section of the garden. I put up a raised planter in front of it and put in some flowering plants. It's becoming one of my fav parts of the garden. To make the friendly ghosts less scary I gave them each a painted flower. I have two more gaps to cover and will have to paint more ghosts! This is going to be my little memorial garden. I need to paint one for Verna Mae with a tomato on it. That was her specialty and also was Ray's. Hmmm.... My mother's has a purple flower . I should change it to her fav lilac colored rose. I associate my Dad with trees and garden tools. I think I'll lean the old pitch fork next to his ghost. Nathan helped me hang a couple strings of small Tibetan Prayer flags for Jackie.

Update on Jackie

I got an email from Jackie's husband today to tell me that she can no longer take phone calls. She is only barely awake when she get's her next dose of morphine and doesn't respond to anyone most of the time. She is slipping away. It is sooooo hard on her family. She is the one with the pain to manage, but they are the ones with the breaking hearts.

This is something Jaxx and I have talked about before. About how inhumane it is to keep a person's body alive when they have NO quality of life left. We would not do this to our dogs, or even to our worst enemies. She would get pretty riled up over this. Yet........ what can we do?

Here are a few pics celebrating her art and life. In one she is holding a secret scroll. The one with J behind the table is in Sac where a group of us gave a talk on altering books and book arts. She was so shy, it took a bit of coaxing to get her to do this, and she was so proud afterwards. It is so obvious to everyone that there is something special about her and her work. It was well received. Jackie is the one that really got me started carving my own stamps. She didn't need to buy special knives or products, she used what she had. These stamps were carved into a styrofoam scrap.

Tomato season in the Valley

When the tomatoes start to ripen there's no stopping them. Jackie and her husband grow them from seed. I'm sure they are enjoying the wonderful flavor of their tomatoes warm from the sun. I picked some strawberries again yesterday and ate them on the way upstairs. LOL They never seem to get to the table. My son Matt is a truck driver This is one of his busiest seasons getting those tomatoes to processing plants during the night hours.

I'm going to share a could pics of some birds that Jackie made today. Online friend Norma had posted some darling little owls someone made and sent to her, and they reminded me of Jackie's birds.

I'm so blessed, but mornings are hard

Every morning I would have a message waiting in my inbox from Jaxx. She gets us earlier than I do. Waaayyyy earlier. So by the time I'm getting started with my day, she's already had a morning walk, some garden time and even more. So, I usually start my day with carrying my old dog downstairs to the garden for his walk, then upstairs again, turn on my lap top and make my bed. Then I get my bowl of cereal and sit down at the computer to read what wonders J observed on her walk, and what her plans are for the day. What book she is reading, what movie they watched last night. The state of the garden. The neighbors chickens. The hummingbirds at the feeder. What they are going to have for lunch. What fun thing she might be going to do with Sophia.

Jackie takes such delight in that special sweet child. Sophia has been cradled in love since she was born. Everyone dotes on that child. Sweetness and goodness radiate from her. And Jaxx is her biggest fan. She paints with her, reads to her, helps her pick out tunes on the piano, etc. All things they enjoy together. Blowing bubbles, squirting water, watching seeds sprout. She says it is like looking at the world through new eyes, seeing things as Sophia sees them.

Then off and on during the day we'd check back in with each other. Usually at lunch time, and late afternoon, and last thing in the evening. I guess I never really thought about how much time we chatted away online. Sometimes it was just a few lines. An idea that struck us that we could share. I'm the one that is out and about, going to meetings, painting with pals, lunching with friends, etc. She could live that part of life through me. She particularly loved hearing about my dogs, my garden, my country place. Or trips to the beach. Or my new recipe sans salt. A new link to an art supply source, or a you tube tutorial. We shared the mundane parts of our lives. Troubles with ants in the kitchen. A scratch on the car. You know. Stuff.

I am so blessed having many friends. But, I miss my morning emails. This morning I got a lovely email from Roberta, and it was about Jackie. It made me cry, partly because what she wrote was so touching and beautiful, and also because I know I'll never get another email from Jackie. Mornings will never be the same.

Years ago, when I lost my aunt Verna Mae, I posted about her passing. How much she meant to me. One of the things Verna Mae taught me was the importance of keeping many friends. One reason is they enrich your life. Another one is - you don't want to be the last man standing. It is so hard to lose a good friend.

Puzzles in the art blog.

I just posted some photos of a collaborative puzzle we are working on in the Lodi Mixed Media group. I would have emailed Jackie when I got home to tell her all about our day and the peoplethere that she knows. She likes to hear these things. Jackie is such a home body, one of my friends said she could not imagine not busily going many places. But, you know, Jackie and her family created a safe haven, full of love. That's exactly where she wanted to be in the center of her world. Her world includes Barnes and Noble, Panera's, her fav Chinese Food Restaurant, I can't remember the name, Starbucks, University Arts, Amazon for books, a yarn shop, the library, etc. A good full life, sans travel.

Once I talked her into taking a workshop with Anne Baldwin in her studio. Roberta Schmidt had asked if some of us from Sac wanted to go, so Sally, Jackie and I went together. It was an awesome experience, and far out of Jackie's comfort zone. I'm quite sure she surprised herself with the collage she made and how comfortable Baldwin's class was. Anyway we were given some Golden acrylics, and most of us gravitated towards the more intense colors. Jackie was the only one who used quite a bit of Titan Buff, which, once I saw it - is now one of my favorites. I use it all the time instead of white. Every time I reach for it, I remember that workshop and what we did there. Sally worked mostly with green that day. Funny the little things one remembers.

Later, Sally and I went on to take another Baldwin workshop at Art and Soul in Asilomar. Jackie could not be persuaded to leave her comfortable nest and travel to the coast.

Here are a couple pics of her art.